my world thanks you for coming into light. you were the perfect hideaway. i spent many nights paying no mind at the moon for open ears. numerous mornings never needed suns rays, for just you were enough to bloom yellow daisies outside my skin. here’s me burning my pride to admit things are empty in the absence of you and internal voids are no fun. apologies for letting you down. i realized myself being selfish with my grip, but tell me how couldn’t one be when coming across such divinity as yourself although my words don’t do you justice. your ancient spirit and immense heart are a gravitational pull. not in a million years are you to be forgotten. my soulmate.

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did you watch the sunset this evening? it reminded me of us. i tasted you there and felt you like electricity along my static edges. ache quickly deep-seated in my chest as the dusk enfolded me. I come to think of that quote of all beautiful things must come to an end and that very well may be true because the crack of dawn is never promised. so I’m taking all that i have left of you and i, to be gently sheltered where I’ll always remember the beauty at the beginning before we died. I feel defeated. all i wanted was to hold you close until my bones collapsed. but I failt at a lot of things. like pretending I don’t love you, when I do. they also say if you love something set it free and if it comes back to you, it’s yours. I guess now it’s the waiting game because I’m finally done chasing winds, love.

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home

I look at you and wonder how someone can beat the ease of the wind. For someone who portrays them self as a wound to the world, you walk with remarkable grace. I look at your arms, oh God, they remind me of velvet clouds. and as tempting as it is to jump right into them, I have this urge to plunge the depths of my chest, curl my fingers around my trembling heart and strip it entirely from these strings, to be carefully placed in the palm of your coarse hands. I waive my right to apologize for every gaze into your lucid eyes, but they have become my favorite place to visit. i search for peace in your vaults of heaven swirled into a grassland, just to marvel at the sunset you`ve been hiding beneath your vessel. no wonder you never cease to fill me with warmth. and for the longest time I thought it was the gates of your smile, but it was the melody of your vocal cords that brought back that remembrance of where home actually is.

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let me be the artist today.

i want to paint you a picture with pastels in so many shades

bleeding the constellations of my thoughts.

an endless spectrum of interwoven blends.

magenta, emerald, violet, fiery orange, dusty blue, ivory .. you name it.

gentle strokes but violently passionate,

a thrill similar to writing in a journal.

only this time, you`re immortalized in canvas.

 

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*

my desire for you ran deeper than what meets the eye

and i adored pulling your heartstrings with precious grip.

until, without warning, you built up those walls and turned back into a chamber.

your lack of reciprocation left me jaded.

i’ll never win with you. we know this.

sorry if i got too close.

i’m trying my best to save myself from your depths

and exist in my own skin

but i’m weighed down.

you make me feel like a butterfly caught in a spider’s web.

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